Stress at work ranges from mild annoyances to
debilitating levels of anxiety. The importance that you attach to each
situation depends on the intensity you ascribe to it, and the degree of control
you have over it.
Part One
First, it’s important to get some perspective
on the events themselves. To do this, follow these three steps:
1. List all the stressors you can think of at
work. Don’t worry about whether they are big or small and don’t judge yourself
for feeling stressed about any of them. Just list them.
2. Next rank them in order of importance and
assign a number from 1-10 for each ¾1
for your small stressors, such as never having enough supplies, up to 10 for
the highest stressors, such as seeing a co-worker with less experience be
promoted before you.
3. Then, consider the most stressful event you
can imagine happening to you at work and assign that a rating of 10.
4. Now go back to your list from #2 and consider
whether any of these ratings has changed. Often when you consider events from
the perspective of the “worst thing that could ever happen” to you, your
original ratings will decrease. See how your first and second sets of ratings
compare.
This exercise shows you the importance
you attach to each situation which you encounter at work that you judge as
stressful. Just seeing the list in front of you gives you a measure of control
because now you know what you are dealing with. You may have identified several
major stressors, or you may have discovered that you have multiple small
stressors which have added up over time.
Part Two
The next step is to determine what is
and isn’t under your control by doing the following:
1. Take each item on your list from Part One and
determine how much of your stress is under your control. For example, if you’re
always running out of supplies, you could buy your own, so this stressor might
be 80% under your control and 20% out of your control. Most supplies could be
readily available at your local office supply store while some are provided
only by the company.
Regarding your colleague’s promotion,
this could be 90% out of your control and 10% under your control. Who gets
promoted is sometimes a joint decision of supervisors and it can be difficult
to know the ins and outs of how management works. You could, however, speak
with your immediate superior about the promotion; acquire some understanding of
the decision-making that went into it; and inquire about your chances for
promotion in the near future.
Problem solve through each one of the items on
your list. What is under your control? What is out of your control? Jot down
your ideas for each item. Assessing the degree of control you have over each
situation, whether you like the resulting percentages or not, is calming
because you’ve decreased the degree of unknowns. Often, it’s the unknowns
that creates the most stress.
Part Three
Your final step is to determine how much
stress is comfortable for you to handle. Stress is an inevitable part of the
workplace and you will not eliminate it entirely, so it’s helpful to understand
how much you can tolerate before you become overwhelmed. Try the following:
1. Take each item on your list from Part Two once
again and decide if you can handle the amount of stress that it generates.
2. If you feel you can handle it, then cross it
out. Perhaps being short on supplies is an annoyance but one that you can
choose to manage.
3. Notice the items you’re left with. These are
the workplace stressors that require your attention. These are the items which
will determine whether you stay with this job¾and
learn better coping strategies¾or
you leave to find a more supportive and reinforcing work environment.
When
stressful events are magnified in intensity, solving them can seem
insurmountable. Multiple minor stressors can build and create intolerable
amounts of stress, while major stressors can be difficult
to identify when you are diverted by minor ones. Sorting through all of your
stressors, to determine what is and isn’t solvable, can help you to feel more
control over your workplace environment in general. With a greater degree of
emotional control, the decisions you arrive at are likely to be more
reasonable, logical, and ultimately more beneficial to you.
Ellen Diana is a psychologist, author of the Lucky
Dreamer Tip Series, and co-author of the Charge
up Your Life series of self-help books. She has
30 years’ experience working with children, adults, couples, and families in
schools and in private practice in Scottsdale ,
Arizona
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