Ask any woman, and probably 99% of them will tell you
they’re dieting, giving up carbs, or preparing for swimsuit season. It’s
apparent that many of us are just not ‘there’ when it comes to accepting our
bodies and body image. Wearing the proper sizes and styles for our body types can
make a big difference in your self-esteem and self- confidence.
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| "I know that if I squeeze into my previous size I won't feel confident!" |
Take moi, for example. I’ve packed on a few (oh, ok- about
15!) extra pounds within the last year or so, and I unequivocally blame the recently
opened Culver’s down the street that offers the ‘mini Concrete Mixer’. I’m joking, of course…it’s my occasional lack
of willpower. And yet, when I get off
the freeway, it’s there…bright blue awnings & twinkly lights adorning the
roof-line - beckoning me…consequently, I’ve moved up a size in clothing, and must
accept that I can no longer feel comfortable, and look stylish when skirts hike
up an additional 2 or 3 inches above my knee due to migrating waistlines that
no longer hit where they should. I know that if I squeeze into the previous
size (which is what 90% of my clothing pieces are), I won’t feel confident.
Rather, I’ll feel that pesky ‘muffin top’ sensation in a pair of jeans, or
realize that my upper arms are not yet toned enough to bare in sleeveless
dresses or tank tops. Shapers are a
must, but if worn under too small a garment, the benefits are essentially null
and void. Can I get an ‘amen’, ladies?!
Working out and eating right are tantamount to achieving the
look you want; however, the clothing you choose is also an important
consideration. Refrain from ‘showing off’ your newly tanned and buff legs if
when you sit down, your skirt hikes up to mid-thigh. You likely won’t feel
comfortable (especially on the job), and you’ll be more concerned with pulling
and tugging, underscoring any self-esteem you may feel only when you rise from
the chair. It may mean buying a few well cut staple pieces in a larger size
(think black skirt/slacks/blazer) until you get to your desired weight, and
where your clothing fits properly again. Choose fabrics that contain a spandex
or polyester material to allow for ‘stretch’. All cotton garments are the
better choice overall, however, there is no ‘give’, and clothing will look and
feel tight. Darker colors tend to be more forgiving, and offer a slimming
effect, and they’re always acceptable in a business environment. Also avoiding
short jackets and lower riding slacks is a good idea if you’ve packed on a few
extra pounds. That’s a self-esteem buster waiting to happen. I know that I feel
best when my clothing fits, no matter if it is a size larger than
what I
normally wear.
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| Knee length skirts |
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| Comfy well fitting slacks |
With summer upon us, I have also found a product that
enables you to go without hosiery, and I am wearing it often. It’s essentially
a leg make-up in a tube that helps to conceal sun spots and small spider veins.
Great for when you want the comfort of a dress or skirt, but not the hosiery.
While that product doesn’t give me self-esteem, it does
provide me a greater sense of self-confidence.
It’s important to keep in mind that
self-esteem comes from within, and not from feeling great in a particular piece
of clothing. Significance and acceptance from others are perceived needs in a
human being; however, we already possess these from our Creator.
Psychoanalyst Karen Horney describes self-esteem as
a “Sense of personal worth and ability that is fundamental to an individual's
identity”. People lacking in self-esteem constantly seek the approval and
acceptance of others. That could include dressing in a manner that draws
attention to oneself.
If the thought of wearing a swimsuit or even a pair
of shorts elicits a shudder, become more proactive by committing to healthy
lifestyle choices including eating better (more fruits and veggies), and
considering an exercise regime. You’ll shed pounds, gain muscle, and while you
may not actually gain self-esteem, you’ll have the confidence that you’re
looking healthy and making good choices-from a health standpoint, and by the
clothing you choose. Most of us cannot afford to purchase a new wardrobe, so make
that commitment to improving your body image, wearing properly fitting and
flattering clothing, and in turn, that self-esteem you do possess will shine
through!
Diane McLelland has been
called a ‘fashionista’ from a young age, acquiring her love of a fashion after
enrolling in Sears Charm School as a young girl. After earning her degree in
Fashion Merchandising and Business, she gained experience by appearing in movies,
commercials, and magazine layouts in the Phoenix area, and worked as a flight
attendant for over 15 years. Diane considers herself to be a personal shopper
as she shops for family and friends whenever possible. She has written for a
travel publication and numerous newsletters and currently works as a Career
Services Advisor, assisting students find viable work in their chosen fields.
She has two grown sons, and along with dog Cooper and ‘his’ two cats, resides
in the Valley of the Sun - Phoenix AZ.
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